I can’t believe I stumbled across this one accidentally! There’s a new blog that I have been reading that isn’t really a blog at all. It’s a guy collecting links to cheap and free stuff on the internet. Generally, I read DealNews everyday to find good technology deals, but this blog, Cheap Stingy Bastard, has some good stuff on it. He colelcts links for anything from magazines to underwear. Well today, I stumbled upon a noteworthy link, “FREE Ant-flatulence underwear.”

All of you who know me, know I have a gas problem. I think I might be lactose intolerant. I don’t know. I fart all the time. I seriously do. It smells real bad. It’s REALLY loud. My roommate calls me “GasMan.” My sister hates me. I have a problem, I admit it. I clicked the link.

What I found is one of the greatest products EVER. Under-Ease was invented by a man who’s wife had Crohns disease and could no longer tolerate the smell in bed. She farted all the time at home, at work, in bed, everywhere. I really can’t say enough about how great this is. Not because I want them, mind you, but because I LOVE this this product HAD to be invented. Let me use quotes from the site to give you the rest of the information:

“On one Thanksgiving night, as my husband and I were lying in bed after a wonderful dinner, the foul smell became unbearable for both of us. My husband ruminated, thinking,”I can’t divorce my wife over this, but I have to do something.” At that moment, he began to develop the idea of a pair of air-tight underwear with a filter that would eliminate the foul smell. For the next few months he researched filter materials and made a prototype of the underwear. “

“Under-Ease are underwear for protection against bad human gas (malodorous flatus) and are made from a soft air-tight fabric (polyurethane-coated nylon). To maintain the air-tightness, elastic is sewn into the material around the waist and both legs. A triangular “exit hole” for the flatus to be expelled is cut from the back of the air-tight underwear, near the bottom. This “exit hole” is covered with a “pocket” made of ordinary porous fabric sewn over the “exit hole”. This unique design forces all expelled gas (flatus) out through the “pocket””

Oh, I love this. Now check my absolute favorite testimonial:
“I am a circus performer and for years I have been embarrassed to pass gas on stage. People in the audience sometime thinks its part of the act but it isn’t. Because of your wonderful product today my audience laughs at my gags and not my gas.” P. Maher, October 7, 2002

I have to stop. This is the greatest day of my life. Even though I didn’t win mega-millions last night.