bloody chainsaw

This is Gregory Depres. He’s 22 years old. On April 25th, he came over the US-Canadian border in Maine carrying, and I shit you not, “homemade sword, a hatchet, a knife, brass knuckles and a chain saw stained with what appeared to be blood.

Gregory Depres

US Customs officers confiscated the weapons, and then LET HIM INTO THE COUNTRY. Why not? You know? Fuck it. I would have detained him because of how he looks, minus the weapons, but I’m a real book-cover-judger, you know?

The next day, “the decapitated body of a 74-year-old country musician named Frederick Fulton was found on Fulton’s kitchen floor. His head was in a pillowcase under a kitchen table. His common-law wife was discovered stabbed to death in a bedroom.”

Guess who did it? “[Depres] was arrested April 27 after police in Massachusetts saw him wandering down a highway in a sweat shirt with red and brown stains. He is now in jail in Massachusetts on murder charges, awaiting an extradition hearing next month.”

What the fuck is going on?! What the fuck are the customs officers doing up there? Jesus Christ!

[thanks Matt.]

11 Comments to “bloody chainsaw”

  1. Ben said something

    I have to type this out to get it straight in my head! They put penguins through the metal detector and confiscate my friggin’ finger nail clippers at the airport, but a man, literally wielding a bloody chainsaw, just cruises right on across the border? WHAT THE FUCK, OVER?!?!

  2. murphy said something

    being a naitive bostonian – i have to applaud the fine job the massachusetts state police did in the apprehension of this man. kudos to you my brothers – yankees suck!

  3. stubZee said something

    They are pretty lax up there. To wit: I just drove back from a Pakistani wedding in Ottawa and they never even batted an eyelash.

    I mean, come on! Pakastanis! I should be having my Q’uran flushed in an 8×8 in Guantanamo right now.

  4. ed adkins said something

    from what i’ve read they were pretty frustrated that they couldn’t detain him longer. They had no way of determining if the chainsaw had blood or rust or red paint on it and he had no outstanding warrants. they questioned him 2 hours and had to let him go.

    if everyone who looked odd or had similar equipment was detained at the border i’m sure there’d be whole blog communities constructed to complain about that as well. I admit it’s a crazy situation but I don’t blame the border guys.

    They should have just had someone follow him out all jack bauer style and break all his fingers until he confessed though. that would have been cool.

  5. Ryan said something

    This story was right next to another on the homepage of the New York Times which infuriated me, wherein the DHS is adamantly refusing to allow a 14-year old Chinese boy (a straight-A student, to boot) to remain in this country merely because his father had him smuggled here. I wrote about it on my page.

  6. Andrew said something

    If I was a border patrol guy and I saw this dude carrying a bloody chainsaw, sword, etc. I would have shit my pants on the spot. Those huge eyes and that greasy horse-tail of a haircut is making my bowels tremble right now.

    I think if you try to enter this country with a deadly weapon, the border patrol should have the power to detain you for 72 hours at their discretion. 2 hours for a “bloody” chainsaw is a joke.

  7. crankx yo said something

    He is a white anglo saxon male. If he was a mexican not only would they not let him in the country they would have bitch slapped him with sticks. It goes to show that our country will allow any white man in with the potential to do harm and if you want to make some money to feed your family you have to swim across a river.

  8. A sad Family Member said something

    I am the neice of Fred Fulton and I live in Canada and I am having a hard time dealing with the fact that the custom officials let this person into the United States has caused much more stress on the family due to the wait now to see if he will be extradited..the hearing is this morning in Boston. But I have to keep telling myself that maybe with grief that my family is experiencing due to this man being let into the States will help someone else’s family by tighting security. It is funny you would think since 9/11 they would have taken better measures and I bet if his skin was a different color and he had been wearing a turbin we still would be there…..

  9. meeeeeee said something

    he’s sexy.

  10. eric lindros said something

    this guy need to be beatin to death

  11. muthafuckabling said something

    Ha ha, funny little mohawk

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