I’m not the only BMoA (Big Man of Astoria) traveling around and getting into funny adventures around the world. Our good friend Rossi recently made himself a legend in Cape Town and a series of emails tells the tale better than I ever could.

——– from Rossi, day 1 ———–
Yeah I’m in South Africa, I have to wait an hour for my room to be set up and I’m in the Biz Center checking emails.

So in the car ride from the airport I saw a wildabest & a zebra. But the best part is my cab driver (this 19 year old kid - Eugine) is a professional break dancer. We talked about old school hip hop the whole ride and he invited me to a “Capoeira vs. B-Boy” event at some local club on Thursday. Apparently this kid is friendly with “Crazy Legs” from the legendary “Rock Steady Crew” and IMs him somewhat regularly

…thought you’d get a kick out of that.

So far by my count I’ve got: breakdancers 1 - baboons 0

(Diclerico - word is in the suburbs of Cape Town (where I am) they have a problem with the infestation of Baboons. Yes, baboons)
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——— from Rossi, day 2 ———-
As for the update on Rossi’s Afrikaan Adventure - I went that to Capoiera vs B-Boy event last night, and I’m going to say, it was one of the top 5 nights out EVER.

As a recap, as you probably remember the driver who picked me up at the airport was this 20 year old kid who was a prof. breakdancer. He invited me to one of his events called Capoiera v. B-Boy (which was a landmark case setting some serious dancing precedents, Mitchell can you look into this?).

So I went to the club where it was at by myself and hung out for about an hour watching some surprisingly good breakdancers, but I didn’t see my driver. I decided I’d stay for a few minutes of Capoiera (brazillian dance fighting) then I’d take off - suddenly my driver Eugine (aka B-Boy Bionics) sees me and yells out “MR ROSSI!!!” he gives me a big hug. I buy him a drink and start a tab. He introduces me to all his friends, and now we have a “crew”. They were hysterical, really really good guys who were hitting on anything that walked by. they come back with shots of tequila for me. I decide that I haven’t spent ANY money on this trip - i’ll expense most of the drinks for us from here on out. Now not only am I “Mr. Rossi” but these guys are introducing me to as “My half brother Jeff from New York” or my favorite “My friend Jeff who’s Mr. Big D!ck from New York” and then they point at my crotch.

Anyway the Capoiera dancers were great, an Afrikaan drum band came out and they were bananas, everyone was dancing, I have a pretty cool video of this

Then they starting playing hip hop - Lloyd Banks, Snoop, and when I was rapping along to “Express Yourself” by NWA - people were looking at me like I just cured cancer on the spot.

Eugine’s friends are bringing over girl after girl, each hotter than the next, and I’m mr big shot buying all of them drinks. One of the guys and I were racing to the bar because he was trying not to let me pay. I tell him “I really appreciate it, but I’m not going to pay for these drinks, my company is” so he turns around and goes to these 5 girls who are standing right there and goes “Which one of you b!tches wants a drink from my man here?” That was basically the whole night, drinking dancing, being Mr. American Big D!ck and having a crew of Africans to have my back.

The friends were hugging me and kept saying “You better come back to cape town, but if you stay at a hotel I’ll be mad - you have to come stay with me, and my mom!”

So I decide let me close out the tab and see what the damage is. Ends up that its 350 Rand. Which is - $48.30 For the whole night. Buying drinks for everyone.

The funniest was towards the end of the night this cute girl from America comes up to me and we start talking. I offer to buy her a drink - she gets a Hunters Beer, I get one too - I give the guy my card, and he goes “Sorry we can only charge if its over 100 rand.” So I go “Fine, then give me ALL the Hunters you have in that fridge.” I buy 10 beers for a cost of 116 Rand - $15 bucks.

Too funny. They apparently are going to pick me up tonight at my hotel around 8 and we’re going out, they said last night was just “ok” and tonight and saturday are the crazy nights and we’re going to go to the ‘good bars’. Suddenly this trip that was shockingly uneventful has taken a ridicuous turn.
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And the aftermath:

——— from Eugine —————-
Hi my brother!!

Its me Eugene, im just checking to see if you got home safely.
yeah the guys are missin you bro, well they all send the greetings and they
say it was a great pleasure meeting you and we hope to see you soon.
This is my hotmail and add.
my yahoo = ——@yahoo.com
so u can add me to yahoo messenger.
well let me know how things are over there and if you got home safely.

Africa Misses U!

peace

Eugene aka B-boy Genetics
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Rossi, you are a legend.